He always lets me down

After anything like this happens I always tell myself not to expect anything from him anymore. However, he soon gets my trust in him built back up and then I think he's not going to let me down this time. Like always he proves me wrong. So here's the story, I'll go back a little ways. So for one he does have a girlfriend now, but of course we're still bestest friends. Okay so he calls me babe and tells me how much he misses me and he promises me that next time he's single I'll be his girlfriend no matter what. That is a freaking load of bullshit!!....I really don't know what it is about this boy that has me hooked but really I can't imagine life without him...I love him. I'm dead serious...I love this kid and he totally takes me for granted. If only he new how much I love him and care for him...but as for now I have nothing to complain about really. I mean I have guys from all over trying to capture my heart..but it's him that is holding me back. He doesn't realize that I won't always be single and that one day he'll be in my shoes...but i don't it will hurt him as much as it hurts me. It hurts like freaking hell! I'm just soo tired of the shit he tells me. I can't wait for the day that he actually means it and backs it up. Or maybe the day where he tells me that he doesn't have feelings for me so just get lost. I just wanna know if I have a future with him like i believe i do. Okay so I do have a few crushes like that Barnard boy...omg he's sooo damn cute!! I would love to get to know him maybe hang out with him some...lol i mean i have options but its just him. I'm just so comfortable with him like doing physical stuff...hehe and idk i can talk to him about anything!! he's just really great...except i don't like him at the moment lol anyways the night before was his girlfriend's prom. that afternoon i was supposed to meet up with him in town just to hang out but i couldn't make it cuz of a scholarship thing. so i texted him on the way home and he was making plans for us to hang out this afternoon. so i told him to text me in the morning. no text this morning, afternoon, or even tonight. he's been on myspace and said something about the greatest night ever...and i'm cool with that but shit he could have at least told me he didn't wanna hang out or something...but maybe he forgot idk..so basically i'll wait till he texts me and see what happens from there. but i'll tell you one thing is for sure i'm gonna let him know how that feels...to have one more nail stabbed into my breaking heart...all because of him.